Loneliness

I mourn for her.  I feel more alone than I have ever felt before.  I turn in every direction looking for comfort that’s not to be found.  I keep turning...... in circles.  I have become a classic record kept after warping just for the sake of being kept.  I stay in a sleeve ornate with lovely artwork.  The record stays there because it cannot get beyond a certain point and is doomed to repeat itself.  The repetition of it is descriptive of how I feel now.  I pace the floor without destination looking for my sweet Spirit keeper, for anything, for my SPIRIT.  Did I have one at all?  Is it something I have lost along the way.... or it is something I have yet to truly find?  I miss Re-Run.  I miss my baby brother.  I miss kayla.  I miss myself.  All I can do is take showers and cry.  Just opening the door to get outside of my rented space is a task.  Television turns me inside out with uncontrollable emotion.  Loneliness is a concept that lays on a dissecting table before me.

Loneliness: lonely, alone